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redmoon
Jul 29, 2008 6:27:00 GMT 10
Post by harvestmoon on Jul 29, 2008 6:27:00 GMT 10
Name redmoon Breed gray Wolf Age 1 years old Gender female Description sleek build, redmoons fur is gray with a redish tint and some white mixed in, redmoon kept her light blue eyes from her cub years. Personality redmoon has a fear of snakes,and dosent like cats,or humans. redmoon loves to hunt, and loves a good dip in the river,also she likes to chase birds and frogs, redmoon is very friendly and is very curious. History when redmoon was a cub she was bitten by a small garden snake, and when a cold winter came she was the only one to survive in her litter, as she grew older she became more independent and one of the best hunters in her pack, then a few monthes later redmoon left to find a new larger pack, one with a larger territory. sample redmoon put her nose down and found the scent once more, she hears a the nervous jitter of the rabbit, she quickly leaps and hits her target. as he carries the dead rabbit away she knows she will feed well tonight... [optional]Picture akvis.com/img/examples/sketch/wolf-color-sketch/wolf-color-photo.jpg
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HalfMoon
Creator
Feb 27th%\2\%
Posts: 772
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redmoon
Jul 29, 2008 21:45:32 GMT 10
Post by HalfMoon on Jul 29, 2008 21:45:32 GMT 10
You need more in Description. Also, you need to use capitals after full stops (at the beginning of every new sentence). Also, your sample post is not in past tense.
Sorry if I seem a bit harsh, you just need to change those few things before I can accept you.
Edit Sorry, I meant Description not Personality - all fixed ^^;
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